A cold wind blew straight into the showgrounds. The car park was packed with rows and rows of cars all lined up straight. The ticket stand lady handed over the wristbands. Mine was blue. I was so excited I could hardly wait. Finally my mum put her wristband on and then we could go in. In the distance I could see horses leaping over jumps that were as tall as me. I asked if we can do some shopping we ended up spending our money on my pony Carlos. I also got to see Mark Todd and he signed my hat. We watched him ride on his horse. His horse is a chestnut. A chestnut is a Goldie horse . Finally its night, go go go come on you can jump it I've seen you jump it before you can do it yaaay ! run run run you can catch up , I'm glad that's over .now it’s the jump off oh on !
Well done Kayla. You responded so well to the feedback. You should be very proud of your writing.
ReplyDeleteGreat story Kayla, keep up the great work :)
ReplyDeleteGreat Kayla but what happens at the end and why are you saying oh no please tell me what the oh no means
ReplyDeleteWow Kayla! I love the way you made a picture in my head as I read your story - I especially love the beginning. Well done. Lucky Carlos.
ReplyDeletethank you
ReplyDelete